Tuesday, November 25, 2014

RETURN TO SUNNYDALE

Nothing was left but a huge crater. A canyon they called Sunnydale Canyon. The
township of Sunnydale was gone.

Thirteen days passed and then the trucks
came. And the workers. A foundation was laid at the bottom of the
canyon.

Thirteen months passed and the new facility was almost done. The new
lab was creating hundreds of jobs even before it opened.     

Police were
concerned about the alarming reports of bat, wolf, and Racoon attacks. And
workers were plagued by flies and mosquitoes.  

The Raccoons were going through
the garbage every night and soon the workers were calling the plant Raccoon city.
The name stuck.
There were record high accident rates and mysterious
disappearances. Some workers were torn apart at night by wolves.

The first
buildings in the city were designed to be underground to conserve energy and
protect the people from bad weather.

Once the underground city was complete
the canyon was filled with dirt to keep the city cooler.

The umbrella
corporation was one of the most successful companies in the industry. They drew
many people to Raccoon city.
Now any city with a lot of people is going to
have some demons and vampires among other things.

I met Mic and Gabe in
a club in Santa Monica called The Asylum. Seemed an appropriate name as it was
full of vampires.
The elder vamps wanted to explore the ruins of Sunnydale
and take what treasure was left behind. Seeing as i had nothing planned for the
next hundred years or so i thought what the hell and went along.  

The new
city was growing fast above ground. People were moving in and starting new lives
unaware that the ghost town below them was a gateway to hell.

The only way
to get to the ruins now was via the new sewers. Place smelled like bloody hell
but the demons had dug out a tunnel to get to the surface.      

Michael had
compelled a demon to lead us to the city. The entrance was well hidden but the
demon knew where it was. Small chap name of L'Tiangle. I like to call 'im T. T
was a greedy lil prat so we had to watch 'im and our wallets closely.


T led us to the door but it was big and heavy and he couldnt move it.

Gabriel and Uriel helped Mic and me open the door and Gabe went in first.

The houses and shops had been pillaged by demons til there was almost
nothing left. Also the place was crawling with vamps during the day hiding from
the sunlight.

Sunny d had become the city of the undead i thought. And
about that time a vamp attacked T and tried to bleed him dry. Mic drew his sword
and beheaded the beast.
Mic and his friends weren't your average daemons.
They were elder demons and high up on the food chain; most demons knew better
than to mess with them. Stupid bugger, i thought as i passed by the vamp, who
was turning to dust.
Someone had rigged the cities lights to the new city
above and the street was lit up like bloody christmas.

As we passed the
Magic Box I heard a scream and a huge man eating bunny rabbit ran out of the
building as a fire ball hit it and burnt its fur. A vengeance demon came to the
door to throw another fireball but the bunny was gone around the corner. It was
Anyanka. "DAM BUNNIES" She said. " I hate rabbits"
Anya looked at me and
smiled. 

"Hi Spike" she hugged me. 
 "An youre alive." 
"Well, they gave me a choice.
Vengeance demon or the bunny cage. and I hate bunnies."
"And now i know why luv," I told her. I looked for the eight foot bunny but it was gone.
"O it will come back. They always come back. dam rabbit. What you doing here Spike?"

"Looking for buried treasure" I told her.
"Oh, you're a pirate now." 
T looked in the door of the magic shop.
"What are you doing?" An asked him
closing the door.
"That's T. He led us here."
"I see. Well pleased to
meet you mister. . . T" An smiled.
"God its been thirteen years now. How the bloody hell are you luv?"
"busy busy busy you know. Vengeance never
rests." she smiled and looked at the door. I come back here to use the safe
sometimes you know."         

"You in town for long luv?" I asked. 
"I have a lot of business in the middle east but I will be back soon." she smiled. 
"K well i will see you then"
An went inside and closed the door as we continued
towards the bank. A man screamed in agony from inside the shop.

It was good to see a familiar face again, but I almost felt sorry for the poor bugger
in the shop. What kind of agony was she putting him through I wondered?
A couple of blocks later we came to the richest building in town, the Sunnydale
Bank. It was not surprising that it was surrounded by goblins. They love
treasure you know.
A couple of them charged us, but Michael compelled them to
defend us and soon half the army was killing the other half for us. I hardly had
to lift my sword...

Once the fight was over, we left our bodyguards
outside and strolled inside the bank. Sitting on a golden throne in front of the
vault was none other than Mammon himself. Daemon of Greed and god of the greedy.
I chuckled to myself as I recalled encountering him before and dubbing him
Mammorys as his body fat count was terribly high and he had a large set of man
boobs on him.
" Get out," Mammon growled at us and sent his bodyguards
toward us. The large hulking Fyarl daemons came towards us and Mic cut the first
one up into little pieces.
"The leader of the Fyarl daemons ordered the
others to attack, but i asked him why he was defending Mammon and he looked at
me...
"You speak Fyarl?" he asked me in disbelief.
"Well yes" i told him.
"Uganda too, long story. Anyway, why are you protecting this lowlife scum?"

I pointed to Mammon.
"He promised us a portion of the loot, " the Fyarl
replied.
"Oh I see,.. well, if you help us, you will get an equal share each
AND live to tell about it, yeah?"
The Fyarl looked at each other and then
turned and charged Mammon, who promptly screamed and vanished in a puff of
smoke...
Then the Fyarl turned and looked at us. Mic looked in the leaders
eyes for a moment then told him to kill the others.  

"Hey, not cool," I told
him.
"What you want to share the booty with all of them?" Michael asked.

At the moment all i could think about was cutting off his head, but i
decided to let it slide as the Fyarl would have probably killed us in our sleep
anyway...

We loaded up our bags with treasure and then Mic told the
Fyarl to stay and guard the rest until we got back. Then we left Sunnydale and
headed for home.
I peaked in the Magic Box on the way out, but all that was
there were some torture instruments covered in blood.
It would be good to see
my flat in Santa Monica again I thought... 

Thursday, October 30, 2014

LITTLE OPRAH ANNIE GOES TRICK OR TREATING

Little Oprah Annie 
Went out for tricks or treats 
She was a witch again this year 
With pointy shoes on her feet 
Her little friend Nancy was a butterfly 
As they walked down the street that night 
A big house caught their eye 
It was large and spooky 
With cobwebs all about 
And a big old jack-o-lantern 
On the steps with eyes and mouth carved out 
As Annie walked the sidewalk 
Nancy fell behind  
Annie told her to come along 
And she heard a kitty whine 
In the distance a wolf howled 
Or maybe it was a dog 
Nancy turned and ran away 
As an evil laugh was heard in the fog 
Little Oprah Annie walked up to the door 
The call of all that candy 
She just would not ignore 
Her little hands trembled 
As she rang the glowing doorbell 
What would come to the door 
She really couldnt tell           

As the door swang wide 
She heard a growling dog 
And turned to see two glowing eyes 
In the distance by a log  
Screams came from inside 
And a shadow crossed the wall 
As a large witch with a pointy hat 
And green face came down the hall 
A little girl with a small dog ran out 
Annie did not know what to do 
As the witch came to the door 
And shouted "and your little doggie too/ 
Well, hello my pretty," 
Said the witch with a glare 
"Dont you look lovely tonight my dear 
Tell me who undoes your hair?" 
The witch reached behind the door 
And Annie thought to run 
Then the witch brought out a candy bowl 
And asked," are you having fun?"  
The candy bowl was full of treats 
Like candy corn and gum 
And the witch handed the girl an apple 
And said,"you look so very sweet"   
The witch invited her in for supper 
"The stove" she said,"is piping hot." 
Then Annie turned and ran away 
As far as her feet could be got 
She never looked back as she ran away 
But she heard the old witch cackle 
"Come back my dear!" the old crone shouted, 
"You forgot your apple!" 
Annie ran straight back home 
With Nancy right behind 
And they ran inside and locked the door 


Scared out of their minds! 

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Lance and the Ghost Ship

Doctor Eli Zeus was not your average scientist and his team was certainly not your average team. Jinx was a master of magic and mystic arts and Dexter AKA Hack was a tech wiz of the highest order, and with our new team mate KB at the com, we thought there was nothing we could not handle....
Lance was sitting at the helm staring off into space when Jinx walked up to him and asked what's wrong. Dex was in the co-pilot's seat and flying to our destination. A distress call had come from somewhere behind Sirius and the team had been sent to investigate it. As we came closer and closer to our POI, Lance was becoming more and more distant I noticed.
"Oh, nothing," said Lance. "I guess I am just a little jet-lagged."
"You were tired, yes, but i sensed something more." said Jinx.
Jinx had this long black hair that went down to her waist and she kept it tied back on missions. Her skills with magicks were only topped by her mental abilities which included empathy and she always felt what we felt to some degree.
"Sometimes I have visions that could not possibly come true," said Lance. "It's nothing. Really."
But was it nothing? Lance focused on the flight path and began to watch the sensor sweeps carefully. He turned up the scanner so everyone could hear any radio transmissions from outside the ship clearly. Mostly, all we heard was static.
As we approached the Sirius 3 space station, something came over the scanner...
"SOS! SOS! Mayday!" The transmission from earlier was being sent again.
"Scan for lifeforms," said Lance.
I turned on every scanner at my reach and watched for green lights, but there were none.
"No signs," I told the Captain.
"I don't feel anyone alive either," said Jinx sadly.
"There were 12 crew members on that post before," said Lance. "Take us into orbit by the Sirius, Zan. I am going in to look around." Lance donned his ghost armor and he and Dex flew to the ship. It always fascinated me how those armored suits could literally fly through walls and turn the user invisible.
"Aye, Captain," I said as I brought the ship into orbit by the station.
Jinx took the con next to me and watched the monitors closely. "Locking transporter beams on them, Zan," she told me as she pushed buttons on the con panel.
"Standby to beam them out on the Captain's order only," I told her.
"Standing by," she replied.
The monitor was dark but the landing team could see much better than us. As they flew through the wall of the station. I heard Dex comment on how it was dark as a tomb inside.
"I don't know where the lights are here," said the Captain. "Activate night mode."
"I have the light controls," said KB from the back of the command center. "Switching on now."
I glanced at the monitor of the bridge and saw KB in her station. "Nice work, K."
"Thanks Zan," she replied.
"Be careful." said Doc over the monitor. He and his team were watching from home base.   
Once the lights came on everyone could clearly see the dead bodies floating around inside the space station. 
"No life signs," said KB sadly.  
"Lance turn on the ships com and get out of there," said Doc Zeus. "We can review there records from here." 
"Should we transport the corpses to home base, Doc?" Lance asked the question but barely noticed the answer.   
"Negative, not until we determine cause of death and scan ship for viruses."  Doctor Zeus was not wanting to bring any dangerous diseases back to the ship or to home base. 
"I have been running scans since we got in range, Doc. There are no detectable parasites or viruses on the station from our files," said KB. 
Thank you Kay," said the Doc. "Begin monitoring video feeds and broadcast all files from the ship at once. And Lance get your team out of there."    
"On the way back now, Doc. Looks like the crew was eaten alive by something big and mean... and carnivorous."  Lance motioned to Dexter to go back and turned to the door. "Lets go Casper."   
Jinx gasped and shouted,"Get out! Abort!" 
Dex phased through the door and flew back to the ship, but before Lance could leave, he was hit by a large alien beast that looked about like a dragon, at least seven feet tall. Lance was no small fellow himself and once he saw that beast facing him and snarling, he pulled a blaster from his side and fired heavily at it. As the beast fell back, Lance phased through the wall and flew to the ship. Everyone on board, sighed, except Jinx who was suiting up in an armor of her own. As Lance reached the ship, he saw Dex passing by him and firing, he turned to see the beast had busted through the door of the station and was in pursuit. Lance fired at the beast, knocking some of its protective scales loose and taking out one of its eyes. 
"Fall back, Casper," ordered the Captain. " Been a while since I fought one of these." Lance stood on the top of the ship with his magnetic boots holding him in place and he chanted as he reached behind his back. As the dragon came closer, it charged Lance and roared as it spread its wings wide. Lance pulled a large silver sword from behind him with a gold hilt and swung hard at the beast, cutting its jaw in two and then he quickly swung again taking off one wing. 
"Inside Dex! He shouted as he took the dragons head off on its return trip. The dragon's decapitated corpse floated off into space as Lance watched it go away. "Thank you, Excalibur." He said as he sent the sword back to its resting place with a Welsh chant. "No life signs..." Lance and Dexter phased inside the ship and sat down.  
"What the hell was that?" Dexter asked. 
"A dragon," said the Captain. "Zan, set course for home base. You have the com." 
"Aye, Captain," I said, changing the flight plan accordingly.  
"Are there more of those things?" KB asked. 
"Where there is one, there are more." Lance took his seat in the Captain's command center as the ship turned for home. As the Space Station faded into view, an uneasy feeling came over me that we were being watched. There was nothing showing on the sensor sweeps, but the sensors had not detected the dragon that attacked us either.

Jinx was still in armor and watching the monitors as we went into hyper drive. It seemed like she and the Captain knew something we did not... As the system faded from view, I could have sworn I heard a roar behind us, or maybe that was just the wind....

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Only in my dreams

So I came home after the worst day ever and limped to the bedroom and went straight to bed. I mean I know that everyday I say worst day ever, but that's only because everyday it gets worse. Literally, every day is worse than the day before.

"I could take you away from this and put you on TV," says Alyssa Milano. 
"You could do that," I ask? 
"Sure, I'm a producer baby," says Alyssa.
"A producer and a witch?" 
"It's your dream baby," she says. 
"I am dreaming?" I ask. 
She laughs and kisses me as she lays beside me on the bed, then she gets up and starts dusting the house with a feather duster. I notice she is wearing a sexy French maid costume.
"Why are you wearing that," I ask her?
"It's your dream baby," she says.   

Then Jennifer Aniston comes to the door in a similar costume.
She climbs on the bed beside me and runs her fingers through my hair as she kisses me. "Good morning, sweety," she says. "Breakfast is almost ready."
"I love you," she says on the way out the door.  
"I love you more," says Alyssa as she kisses me again.
"Oh yeah, I am dreaming," I say.   

I get out of bed and take a shower. As I hear the door open, I wonder who came in, then I hear her undressing and she climbs in to lather up my back.
Surprisingly, she seems to have done this before, I think amazed. I cannot believe that Pam Anderson is standing in my shower washing my back. I turn around as she nudges me and she puts her arms around my neck.

"Are you ready?" She asks.
"For what?" I ask realizing that I have no idea what is going on.
"For your studio day, sweetie." She kisses me and I realize that I am really liking this dream. "You asked me to get you some studio time last week. Remember?"
"Not really," I shrug and smile.
"You're meeting Britney and Mariah today for the new singles, baby."
"Okay... cool. When?"
"In about an hour," she says as she runs her fingers through my hair and moves closer. Man, I hope I never wake up, I think.

After the shower, Pam and I go downstairs. I look around at the beautiful mansion that we are in and ask whose is it?
"Yours silly," she smiles.
"I have a mansion in Beverly Hills?" I ask.
"Its your dream," she smiles and kisses me as she leads me by the arm to the dining room where Rachael Ray is serving breakfast.
"Hey sweety, got all your favorites for your big day." Rachael says as she kisses me good morning. "I gotta go do my show, but I will see you Wednesday for dinner. Okay? Have a great day."
Yep you're dreaming I think as Rachael Ray kisses me good bye and runs out the door.

"Next week, she will be filming from the studio out back so she wont have to leave so early," says Pam.
"Who is making dinner tonight?" Jennifer asks as she sits down at the table to eat.
"Giada DeLaurentiis," says Pam, looking at the schedule.
"Oh I love her show," says Alyssa as she rubs my shoulders.

"Okay, I am here," says Britney as she walks in the dining room and kisses me hello. "Are you ready to make beautiful music together?" Britney smiles and puts her arms around me as she sits on my lap.
Oh yeah, I am dreaming; please don't wake me, I think.
"Are we using the studio in house or going out today?" Britney asks Pam.
"Out to the label today. Mariah is meeting us there. Limo is waitng in the garage." says Pam.
"Oh good, I love our new limo, baby" she says as she kisses me again. "Who's driving today?"
"Danica insisted on driving you today." Pam smiles. "Shall we go?"

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! I awake to the sound of my alarm clock screaming at me and roll over to hit the button. Realizing that it was only I dream and now I cannot get back into it, I hurl the clock into the next room and roll over and go back to sleep. Damn clock.